Mark Duffy has written the Copyranter blog for 11 years and is a freelancing copywriter with 25-plus years of experience. His hockey wrist shot is better than yours.
I’ve been searching for the perfect stock photo for over 30 years. In the beginning, it was paging through thicker-than-the-September-Vogue stock photo books and then, tens of thousands of pages online.
Of course, you can never quite find the perfect stock photo for whatever project you’re working on — that’s the point of “stock” photos. But you sometimes can find one that’s really close: If you have the inner strength of a gladiator to “just look at one more page” after going through thousands of horribly generic, boring photos.
Most stock photo models have a non-ness about them. They’re there, but they’re not there. The photographers are partially to blame. But then last week, while I was searching for “old man using computer” for this “Ageism in the Digital Age” post, I found this very present, very real gentleman on Shutterstock captioned: “Senior man using laptop computer at rest in the park outdoors.”
Right there, there was all of my inner angst, staring right into my senior, brown eyes.
Notice how it looks like this senior man was just sitting there, “at rest,” when the photographer (Sergei Primakov) ruined his afternoon by placing this horrible-looking laptop on his lap and said “pretend you’re using it and look into the camera.” SNAP.
The oversized laptop then (probably) slipped off the senior man’s lap (something that has happened to me many times) and fell to the ground. Of course he doesn’t know how to use it. He doesn’t want to.
A “dæmon” is, according to fantasy author Philip Pullman (“The Golden Compass,” etc.), the external physical manifestation of a person’s “inner-self” that takes the form of an animal.
My dæmon animal just happens to be human.
Above are two more shots from the series. Look at his hands (left). He has no idea what he is doing, which is my automatic mental state. Then (right), the photog threw a pair of ill-fitting glasses on him. OH YEAH, now he looks like an IT developer. Most photographers are assholes, trust me.
Most of you probably think I’m not being frank, that I’m being a sarcastic prick at the expense of this stock photo model. To you-all, I say: Stop reading now, and go “have sexual intercourse with yourself,” as my editor would prefer I word it. [Ed. note: This is true. Thank you, Mark]
My dæmon is also the model in two other Shutterstock series: one titled “Shattered bandits man with bruises and hematomas,” and the other “Captain in the tourist travel. Pending the ship at the pier.” He looks more at home as a traveling captain, because that’s what he is.
Primakov has also shot the same man for Dreamstime stock photos, including a series titled: “The old man fired.” I was fired as an old man by BuzzFeed. This “mature man using computer” has gone “viral” lately. But I’m sorry: that smile is as fake as his teeth.
Senior Man Using Laptop Computer At Rest? You have made me more woke than I’ve ever been. Stay safe.
Marketers bring Web3 to the FIFA World Cup with augmented reality, NFTs and virtual worlds
The month-long tournament, which begins this weekend, will be the first World Cup since it took place in Russia in 2018 long before “Web3” entered the global lexicon. Now, official and non-official sponsors are hoping to harness the hype with a range of NFTs, virtual worlds, augmented reality tools and other trendy tech.
U-Haul diversifies its social strategy to tell people it’s more than moving trucks
In recent years, U-Haul's in-house agency has been working to "better leverage social media for brand loyalty."
Google’s Privacy Sandbox is coming to Android
Google's MAID will be phased out, here's what you need to know.
SponsoredHow brands are measuring incremental performance on CTV
Connected TV is unique among other advertising channels because it combines linear television’s storytelling capabilities with digital marketing’s targeting and measurement. As more marketers leverage CTV advertisements to reach relevant and engaged audiences, they also want to understand the real value they are generating with their investment. Incrementality reporting and measurement allow advertisers to measure […]
Digiday+ Research: Instagram wins over Facebook for role in brands’ holiday marketing
Brands differ on how they use each marketing channel during the holidays -- even when it comes to sibling social media platforms Facebook and Instagram, Digiday+ Research found.
How — and why — Candy Crush is in the midst of a 10th anniversary brand refresh
In the years since Activision Blizzard acquired the Swedish game studio King in 2016, employees at the gaming giant have started to internally refer to their company as “ABK” — that is, Activision Blizzard King. But the corporation’s recent financial reports indicate that “KAB” might be a more accurate abbreviation.